Camp Hypocrite

This is like when a "B" (or AA), can say the "N" word but a "W" (or C) can't.  Camp Twitch and Shout?  No way I could ever get away with that!  F this.

too soon?

Adam Yauch of the Beastie Boys has a cancerous tumor in one of his salivary glands. We here at Blog and Main wish him the best of luck and a speedy recovery. As a public service announcement we'd also like to remind the rest of you to...

nostalgia...

Chances are if you are reading this, you have eaten at the chain known as Domino's Pizza*. During the 80's they had a marketing campaign featuring a character the "Noid". His entire existence was making pizzas inedible so obviously he was an employee of Dominos. The whole point was to "avoid the Noid" meaning you should eat decent pizza. It made absolutely no goddamn sense whatsoever. According to his Wikipedia page he was not actually funny but more importantly it also said the following...

In 1989, Kenneth Lamar Noid, a mentally ill customer who thought the ads were a personal attack on him, held two employees of an Atlanta, Georgia Domino's restaurant hostage for over five hours. After forcing them to make him a pizza and making demands for $100,000, getaway transportation, and a copy of The Widow's Son, Noid surrendered to the police.^[1] Noid was charged with kidnapping, aggravated assault, extortion, andpossession of a firearm during a crime. He was found not guilty by reason of insanity.

Aren't you glad you've avoided him for so long?*

*sadly

If Akon, U can.

Look, I don't know Lady Gaga, but I assume she is a nice gal.  Most british royalty are.  But from what I can tell, all she likes to do is fuck and gamble...and if there is one thing I look for in a deity...it is those two things.  She is the kinda gal that is a hushed whisper away from selling you on anal and before you can ask a follow-up she has smoked your finest Cohiba Robusto without using her lips.  If marriage was an 8-letter word for hate-screw I would have said "I DO" a month ago.

FAFOT: July 15, 1944

.

Is wndr I aint left all m’ideals, seem so

absrd+ imprctcl.Yet I cling 2 dem bcuz I stll

blieve,d spite evrythg, dat ppl r truly good @ hrt

.

.

Remembering the most shocking death ever to follow a successful suicide attempt

Look, I miss Michael Jackson as much as any kid misses his blanky when it's gone.  (I mean, as much as any kid misses his blanky that he or she repeatedly has sex with in between awkward public appearances and denials on 60 minutes.)  But seriously, how disturbed must Michael have been to insist on having white kids?  More surprisingly, how rich do you have to be have the surgery done where your sperm color chromosomes are altered from black to white?  Unreal.  I mean that has to cost at least $50K a job right?  And what if you get an urge in a public restroom to relieve your sexual anxiety?  $50K in a generic kleenex flush - that's what happens.  And what is this procedure called?  Liponegroplasty?  Arianaugmentation?  Honkimplants?  What happens to Mike Jr when he brings out 5 inches of Billy Jean to some P.Y.T. on prom night, only to discover pops embarrassed the man in the mirror by not knowing if he was black or white?  The only good news to come out of this death is the kids FINALLY got to see Staples Center at the memorial today since Lakers playoff basketball, WWE Monday Night Raw, and Brittany Spears Circus were all sold out there earlier this month.  Today's tribute was an appropriate end to a versatile pigmented entertainer in perhaps the most versatile of venues.  

Forgotten Memories Remembered Again Finally

This weekend, a great friend of B&M died, Mr. Steve McNair.  Although we never met, it was clear that our relationship could not be weakened by distance or reality.  On these trying days following the loss, I wanted to take a moment to reflect on all the things he taught us...

For many years I thought Steve McNair was the americanized name of former CFL great Warren Moon.  I was young when the two of them overlapped careers, but it was an honest mistake.  I mean, come on, TWO black quarterbacks?  With the same franchise?  In Texas?  This was when Spike Lee was relevant and he use to make stories up so that he could make movies about reality.  I can't be the only one who thought they looked a like and talked a like.  I bet if you ask any other person who grew up in a predominantly white sheltered neighborhood without blacks they would say the same thing to.

Mr McNair also fueled my love for business and marketing at a young age.  I was so confused why his nickname of "Air McNair" was readily accepted as nouveau and hip when it was really just rhyming alliteration.  It wasn't necessarily McNair's fault, but I still blame him for the failed launch of this 18 year olds failed marketing career, as well as the never-blossomed sports apparel lines of "Shock and Darrell dAWEkins" and "Spud wEBB and Flow".

Certainly Titans fans, as well as sports fans in general, will always be grateful to McNair for letting us know it is ok to booo a black quarterback.  Shortly after Rosa Parks stepped off the bus and Warren Moon was inserted into the starting lineup for the Oilers, people weren't really sure what etiquette should be in the stands.  McNair diffused a potentially awkward race war by consistently throwing comedically bad interceptions.

Steve "LaTreal" McNair and his wife Mechelle also taught me that proper names can be whatever the hell you want them to be.

Lastly, dude was pulling down 19 year old tang at age 36.  That doesn't really teach me anything, but it does confirm that when you are rich you can do whatever the hell you want to do.  Oh wait, don't date chicks with guns.  Lesson learned.  Thank you Air.

He will be missed.